It's hard to believe that it was eight years ago already. I was 19 years old and quite possibly experienced the coolest night of my life. It's funny how much has changed in the eight years but the memories remain fresh in my mind.
It started at a Seton Hall basketball game. I had a video camera for Pirate TV which put me on the floor for the game. It was December 4, 2000 and the Pirates were hosting Norfolk State University. It was a crappy game so it was held on campus in the teeny tiny Walsh Gym and not at Continental Airlines Arena where the rest of the home games were played that year. This turned out to be a huge game for two reasons, both revolving around the All-American freshman Eddie Griffin. Griffin would complete the school's very first triple double, hitting for double figures in points, rebounds and blocked shots. But he would also get hurt in this game. Here we were, a top 10 program with perhaps the best freshman in the country and he goes down with a knee injury. As previously mentioned, this was a crappy game that nobody cared about... including the media. So all of a sudden, this 19 year old kid had perhaps the most important sports video in the tri-state area.
My friend John had the idea first to call ESPN to see if they may want the tape of the injury. If you knew me at the time, you knew that my only goal in life was to eventually work for ESPN, half of my wardrobe had those four glorious letters stitched on the front, so to call ESPN and ask if they wanted my video was really cool. But the coolest part was the fact that they said YES! We started talking about satellite coordinates and how we could beam the video up to Bristol from South Orange NJ. I was slightly embarassed when I had to tell them that we could barely make popcorn at the tv studio on campus let alone beam anything to anywhere. So it was decided that we would drive into Manhattan and stop by ABC to drop off the tape.
It was around midnight when we got to ABC. They had to wait until the Monday Night Football game was over before they could send it up to Bristol but our work was done: Two college kids drove into Manhattan at midnight and dropped off exclusive video to ABC sports and ultimately ESPN. It was even better the next day when I received phone calls from CBS and Fox, among other stations, that also wanted a copy of our video.
For a day and a half, I was the luckiest guy in the world. Lucky to be at the game with a video camera, lucky to have a friend with an idea and a car and lucky to be in college twelve miles outside of the media capital of the world.
A lot has changed in eight years. My friendship has been up and down for various reasons. The All American freshman left for the NBA after this only season at the Hall, had some success before getting mixed up with drugs and alcohol and ultimately died a year ago when his SUV hit a train. But, I still have those four letters stitched onto my clothes as a proud host for an ESPN Radio affiliate.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Saturday, October 4, 2008
The Agony of Defeat
I never played football growing up. Looking back I wish I would have given it a shot; I bet I would have been good at something. It never really came to mind as a child and although I thought about it as I entered high school, I was a kick-ass drummer so I stuck with the band.
It wasn't until I started working with the Lehigh University football program did I truly get to experience the high after a win, and unfortunately, like today, the lowest of lows after a tough loss.
For the last few years, I've been part of the broadcast crew with Lehigh, handling the pregame and postgame shows as well as the sideline reporting duties. Im never more than a few feet away from the playing field so I've never been so close to the action. Just after the first half and at the conclusion of the game, Im one of the first people to talk to the head coach, which is either a blessing after a big win or one of the toughest assignments ever after a deflating loss.
Today was one such loss.
After battling back and forth for most of the game, Lehigh took what it thought was the lead for good with just over five minutes to go. Cornell got the back with 78 yards to go needing a touchdown to win and proceeded to methodically march down the field, eating up every second and every yard, winning the game on fourth and 6 from the 20 yard line as time expired. The Lehigh faithful let out a huge gasp, followed by deafening silence and I was left with just moments to adjust my post-game interview.
Despite the loss, I can honestly say that it was one of the coolest moments in my life. The stadium was quaking behind me, I was into the game as if I were in uniform. And hell, maybe the "LEHIGH" was embroidered on my polo shirt and jacket and not stitched onto a jersey, but I felt like I WAS in uniform. And as a member of the "team" this one hurt. I felt for the coach, who struggled to find the words after a loss like this one. I wouldnt go so far as to call the two of us friends, but its hardly a stretch to say we are friendly with eachother. I felt for the players, who fought so hard for 60 minutes, only to come a play short. Football, as they say, is a game of inches and if that defensive back were only a few inches taller...
As tough a loss as it was, I wouldnt trade the experience for anything. Unlike when I was a child, today I had a football game. Unfortunately, my team lost, but there's always next week and I'll be ready.
It wasn't until I started working with the Lehigh University football program did I truly get to experience the high after a win, and unfortunately, like today, the lowest of lows after a tough loss.
For the last few years, I've been part of the broadcast crew with Lehigh, handling the pregame and postgame shows as well as the sideline reporting duties. Im never more than a few feet away from the playing field so I've never been so close to the action. Just after the first half and at the conclusion of the game, Im one of the first people to talk to the head coach, which is either a blessing after a big win or one of the toughest assignments ever after a deflating loss.
Today was one such loss.
After battling back and forth for most of the game, Lehigh took what it thought was the lead for good with just over five minutes to go. Cornell got the back with 78 yards to go needing a touchdown to win and proceeded to methodically march down the field, eating up every second and every yard, winning the game on fourth and 6 from the 20 yard line as time expired. The Lehigh faithful let out a huge gasp, followed by deafening silence and I was left with just moments to adjust my post-game interview.
Despite the loss, I can honestly say that it was one of the coolest moments in my life. The stadium was quaking behind me, I was into the game as if I were in uniform. And hell, maybe the "LEHIGH" was embroidered on my polo shirt and jacket and not stitched onto a jersey, but I felt like I WAS in uniform. And as a member of the "team" this one hurt. I felt for the coach, who struggled to find the words after a loss like this one. I wouldnt go so far as to call the two of us friends, but its hardly a stretch to say we are friendly with eachother. I felt for the players, who fought so hard for 60 minutes, only to come a play short. Football, as they say, is a game of inches and if that defensive back were only a few inches taller...
As tough a loss as it was, I wouldnt trade the experience for anything. Unlike when I was a child, today I had a football game. Unfortunately, my team lost, but there's always next week and I'll be ready.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
The Godfather Chronicles
Thursday September 18 – 11:00AM
Im going on a little trip to Dayton Ohio to see my beautiful five-month old goddaughter Sofia so I thought I’d keep a blog while I’m gone. This will mostly come in the airport out of boredom but we’ll see how it goes.
I left the house this morning at 10AM. My sister, Megan, was gracious enough to take me to the airport. Had I left in my car and driven to Dayton, I would probably get there around 6PM. As it turns out, that’s earlier than I will get there anyway. My flight is due in at 6:40PM but that’s mostly airport time. I still have close to an hour to go here in Allentown and then a big three and a half hour wait in Detroit. At least I can stop at a bar and have a bite to eat and a beer or two… oh wait, not on this diet… more on that later.
My day of waiting got off to a good start as I stood in line at the Northwest Airlines check-in counter for a good 20 to 30 minutes. It seems that the sign that gave the hours of operation was indeed operational. Finally not one but three girls came out of the back to help the line of people waiting. I don’t know what they were doing back there but I’m sure whatever it was didn’t involve three people. And what’s with the $15 charge to check my luggage? It’s their job to get me from one place to another. Is it not also their job to make sure my bag gets there as well? What did I already pay for? Its like going to a restaurant and paying $65 for dinner and then an extra $15 for the use of the plates, glasses and silverware.
So I’m on this pretty intense diet that involves a bar for breakfast and lunch and then a shake as a midmorning snack and an afternoon snack. If there is one place you don’t want to look suspicious, it’s the airport. I can only imagine how I looked as I’m trying to measure out 8 oz of water in my “beaker-type” jar and pouring a powdery substance into the water. What a great place to do a science experiment – Gate 7 at Lehigh Valley International Airport. At least there weren’t a lot of people around to watch me drink the stuff. I can’t wait to do it in a few hours in Detroit!
I can’t say enough about how excited I am to see Tim, Jess and Sofia. I flew out for her baptism in May and then I saw them a few times when they were home in July. She’s growing so fast these days from what they tell me. I didn’t want to wait until Christmas to see her so I figured I’d take a few days to go out now and see how she is doing.
I’ll try to check in from time to time while I’m gone. Don’t miss me too much.
Im going on a little trip to Dayton Ohio to see my beautiful five-month old goddaughter Sofia so I thought I’d keep a blog while I’m gone. This will mostly come in the airport out of boredom but we’ll see how it goes.
I left the house this morning at 10AM. My sister, Megan, was gracious enough to take me to the airport. Had I left in my car and driven to Dayton, I would probably get there around 6PM. As it turns out, that’s earlier than I will get there anyway. My flight is due in at 6:40PM but that’s mostly airport time. I still have close to an hour to go here in Allentown and then a big three and a half hour wait in Detroit. At least I can stop at a bar and have a bite to eat and a beer or two… oh wait, not on this diet… more on that later.
My day of waiting got off to a good start as I stood in line at the Northwest Airlines check-in counter for a good 20 to 30 minutes. It seems that the sign that gave the hours of operation was indeed operational. Finally not one but three girls came out of the back to help the line of people waiting. I don’t know what they were doing back there but I’m sure whatever it was didn’t involve three people. And what’s with the $15 charge to check my luggage? It’s their job to get me from one place to another. Is it not also their job to make sure my bag gets there as well? What did I already pay for? Its like going to a restaurant and paying $65 for dinner and then an extra $15 for the use of the plates, glasses and silverware.
So I’m on this pretty intense diet that involves a bar for breakfast and lunch and then a shake as a midmorning snack and an afternoon snack. If there is one place you don’t want to look suspicious, it’s the airport. I can only imagine how I looked as I’m trying to measure out 8 oz of water in my “beaker-type” jar and pouring a powdery substance into the water. What a great place to do a science experiment – Gate 7 at Lehigh Valley International Airport. At least there weren’t a lot of people around to watch me drink the stuff. I can’t wait to do it in a few hours in Detroit!
I can’t say enough about how excited I am to see Tim, Jess and Sofia. I flew out for her baptism in May and then I saw them a few times when they were home in July. She’s growing so fast these days from what they tell me. I didn’t want to wait until Christmas to see her so I figured I’d take a few days to go out now and see how she is doing.
I’ll try to check in from time to time while I’m gone. Don’t miss me too much.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Constant Reminders
We are never short on reminders of just how precious life can be. And yet, one of the things we take for granted most of all is life itself.
We procrastinate, we put things off for another time and worst of all, we leave things unsaid. "I've got work to do, I'll do it next Spring." "She knows how I feel about her." Will you? Does she? What if next Spring never comes? What if she just isn't sure?
My grandfather died seven years ago this past week. On the night before he died, we said goodbye and everyone gave him a kiss. Well, that would be everyone but me. I shook his hand. We had no idea that it was the last goodbye. Seven years and three days later, I've wanted nothing more than to give my grandfather a kiss. There was supposed to be more time, plenty of chances to say goodbye. I was just saying goodbye for the night, I'd see him again tomorrow. I did see him the next day, and I kissed him, but he was already gone. Regrets because we are too proud.
I'm sure we've all lost someone along the way, someone who left us far too soon. You think about him often and know you should give him a call but something always comes up. Christmas is just around the corner and he'll be home for a few days. You're sure you'll catch up with him then. The phone rings and you find out that Christmas isn't coming for him and its going to be quite different for you this year too. Regrets because there's not always tomorrow.
A local high school basketball coach died last week. Based on his record, you could say that he was an amazing coach. By all accounts, he was an even more amazing person. He retired at the end of the season because he wanted to spend more time with his family. No one knew that the 48-year-old coach would only have a few short months to spend with them. Here's a guy who had no idea how little time he actually had left and made time for his family. Im sure the last few months will help the family get by a little easier. Then there are other people who seemingly have all the time in the world and yet never make time for loved ones because there is always the promotion to chase after and more money to make. Regrets because some things are more important.
The world gives us constant reminders of how short life can be. Maybe it is an early morning dorm fire that sees hundreds escape but claims the lives of three. Maybe its the family man who works near the top of a skyscraper that doesnt make it home. And maybe its an 80-year-old man who you think will be there the next morning.
The world gives us constant reminders to live our lives to the fullest, to show our loved ones just how much we care. Jobs, promotions, money... all of it will come and go. Friends and family are what its all about. And eventually they will go too. Which means we need to take advantage of the time we have. Take a day off and spend it with the one you love. Call your buddy even if you'll see him in a few weeks. And for God's sake, kiss your grandfather.
The world gives us constant reminders. Hopefully we all can take advantage of them. Before there are more regrets.
We procrastinate, we put things off for another time and worst of all, we leave things unsaid. "I've got work to do, I'll do it next Spring." "She knows how I feel about her." Will you? Does she? What if next Spring never comes? What if she just isn't sure?
My grandfather died seven years ago this past week. On the night before he died, we said goodbye and everyone gave him a kiss. Well, that would be everyone but me. I shook his hand. We had no idea that it was the last goodbye. Seven years and three days later, I've wanted nothing more than to give my grandfather a kiss. There was supposed to be more time, plenty of chances to say goodbye. I was just saying goodbye for the night, I'd see him again tomorrow. I did see him the next day, and I kissed him, but he was already gone. Regrets because we are too proud.
I'm sure we've all lost someone along the way, someone who left us far too soon. You think about him often and know you should give him a call but something always comes up. Christmas is just around the corner and he'll be home for a few days. You're sure you'll catch up with him then. The phone rings and you find out that Christmas isn't coming for him and its going to be quite different for you this year too. Regrets because there's not always tomorrow.
A local high school basketball coach died last week. Based on his record, you could say that he was an amazing coach. By all accounts, he was an even more amazing person. He retired at the end of the season because he wanted to spend more time with his family. No one knew that the 48-year-old coach would only have a few short months to spend with them. Here's a guy who had no idea how little time he actually had left and made time for his family. Im sure the last few months will help the family get by a little easier. Then there are other people who seemingly have all the time in the world and yet never make time for loved ones because there is always the promotion to chase after and more money to make. Regrets because some things are more important.
The world gives us constant reminders of how short life can be. Maybe it is an early morning dorm fire that sees hundreds escape but claims the lives of three. Maybe its the family man who works near the top of a skyscraper that doesnt make it home. And maybe its an 80-year-old man who you think will be there the next morning.
The world gives us constant reminders to live our lives to the fullest, to show our loved ones just how much we care. Jobs, promotions, money... all of it will come and go. Friends and family are what its all about. And eventually they will go too. Which means we need to take advantage of the time we have. Take a day off and spend it with the one you love. Call your buddy even if you'll see him in a few weeks. And for God's sake, kiss your grandfather.
The world gives us constant reminders. Hopefully we all can take advantage of them. Before there are more regrets.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
My Goddaughter
Everyone always says that you can't choose your family and it is true. You're born into it and you're stuck with it. But there is a way that your family can choose you and that's exactly what happened to me on Saturday April 12, 2008.
As the clock was approaching 8PM little Sofia Gabrielli came into this world and I am told she immediately asked if Uncle Markus would be her godfather. Through the tears in my eyes, I emphatically told her father that I would be honored. As much as you think about how cool something would be, it never prepares you for when you get that phone call and it becomes a reality.
I was speechless. No, actually the first words out of my mouth were "no way" but obviously that was not my final answer. After hanging up the phone I had no idea what to say, no idea what just happened. Even to this day I have to keep checking my cell phone, looking for the picture to tell me that it actually happened.
To use an employment analogy, my resume would probably not be on top of the pile. I'm not a perfect guy, then again who is? But Tim and Jess thought enough about me to bestow on me the greatest honor I can imagine. To some it might not be a big deal. It seems like everyone is a godfather or godmother out there. Sometimes all you have to be is a brother or a sister and you're asked to be a godfather or godmother as if its a given. But this is different. Neither one of them have a brother so its not that simple. But even more than that, they have deep convictions in their faith and I would imagine took their options very seriously. And despite all that, they still found me worthy of this great distinction. What were they thinking?
We hear about unconditional love but I always thought that I wouldn't know what that feels like until I have children of my own. I think I have a pretty good idea though already. I have never met this little girl and yet she is already my favorite person in this world. I can not wait to meet her and start to spoil my goddaughter.
I guess I'll have to start saving my money for extra plane tickets to Ohio. The Gabrielli's might just see me on their doorstep on random weekends just to see my little angel as often as I can. Tim and Jess wanted me in her life for a very special reason. I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that I am there for her and that she always knows that Uncle Markus loves her very much. And truth be told, Uncle Markus will always love mommy and daddy Gabrielli just as much.
As the clock was approaching 8PM little Sofia Gabrielli came into this world and I am told she immediately asked if Uncle Markus would be her godfather. Through the tears in my eyes, I emphatically told her father that I would be honored. As much as you think about how cool something would be, it never prepares you for when you get that phone call and it becomes a reality.
I was speechless. No, actually the first words out of my mouth were "no way" but obviously that was not my final answer. After hanging up the phone I had no idea what to say, no idea what just happened. Even to this day I have to keep checking my cell phone, looking for the picture to tell me that it actually happened.
To use an employment analogy, my resume would probably not be on top of the pile. I'm not a perfect guy, then again who is? But Tim and Jess thought enough about me to bestow on me the greatest honor I can imagine. To some it might not be a big deal. It seems like everyone is a godfather or godmother out there. Sometimes all you have to be is a brother or a sister and you're asked to be a godfather or godmother as if its a given. But this is different. Neither one of them have a brother so its not that simple. But even more than that, they have deep convictions in their faith and I would imagine took their options very seriously. And despite all that, they still found me worthy of this great distinction. What were they thinking?
We hear about unconditional love but I always thought that I wouldn't know what that feels like until I have children of my own. I think I have a pretty good idea though already. I have never met this little girl and yet she is already my favorite person in this world. I can not wait to meet her and start to spoil my goddaughter.
I guess I'll have to start saving my money for extra plane tickets to Ohio. The Gabrielli's might just see me on their doorstep on random weekends just to see my little angel as often as I can. Tim and Jess wanted me in her life for a very special reason. I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that I am there for her and that she always knows that Uncle Markus loves her very much. And truth be told, Uncle Markus will always love mommy and daddy Gabrielli just as much.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Tattoo
I can't carry on my grandparents' name, but I can carry their name on me. This is the meaning behind my tattoo.
I got a tattoo on Saturday. I had wanted one for a number of years and I finally sucked it up and got it. My family had little to no faith that I would actually go through with it so I dont know what that says about my reputation but I got it and I love it.
It is a Celtic Shamrock accented in green and an Old English "B" in black. The shamrock is easily understandable because I've wanted one for a long time. The "B" is for my maternal grandparents, Bernie and Peg Brotzman. As I stated, I can't carry on their name but I wanted to carry them with me.
There is another meaning behind the tattoo. "B" could very well also stand for Brother because I got the tattoo with my two brothers. Some of you might be sitting there thinking "I didnt even know he had brothers." While the ones who know me best are saying "I know he doesnt have brothers." But then you would all be wrong. My parents might have only had me and two girls but it doesnt mean I dont have brothers. Chris and Jon Kindred are my brothers, always have been and always will be. We share the Brotzman grandparents which officially makes us cousins, but the bond that we have shared since we were younger makes us even more.
We have been through a lot together, both good and bad. When a close death in November had us all thinking about mortality and family, it became apparent that we needed to do something to stengthen that bond. We had been talking about tattoos for a while and the events of last Fall cemented our desire.
Chris got his on his left leg, Jon on his right. I got mine on my shoulder. Unique spots, but with the same message of brotherhood.
Neither one of us will carry on the Brotzman name, but we will always carry it in our hearts, and on our bodies.
I got a tattoo on Saturday. I had wanted one for a number of years and I finally sucked it up and got it. My family had little to no faith that I would actually go through with it so I dont know what that says about my reputation but I got it and I love it.
It is a Celtic Shamrock accented in green and an Old English "B" in black. The shamrock is easily understandable because I've wanted one for a long time. The "B" is for my maternal grandparents, Bernie and Peg Brotzman. As I stated, I can't carry on their name but I wanted to carry them with me.
There is another meaning behind the tattoo. "B" could very well also stand for Brother because I got the tattoo with my two brothers. Some of you might be sitting there thinking "I didnt even know he had brothers." While the ones who know me best are saying "I know he doesnt have brothers." But then you would all be wrong. My parents might have only had me and two girls but it doesnt mean I dont have brothers. Chris and Jon Kindred are my brothers, always have been and always will be. We share the Brotzman grandparents which officially makes us cousins, but the bond that we have shared since we were younger makes us even more.
We have been through a lot together, both good and bad. When a close death in November had us all thinking about mortality and family, it became apparent that we needed to do something to stengthen that bond. We had been talking about tattoos for a while and the events of last Fall cemented our desire.
Chris got his on his left leg, Jon on his right. I got mine on my shoulder. Unique spots, but with the same message of brotherhood.
Neither one of us will carry on the Brotzman name, but we will always carry it in our hearts, and on our bodies.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Not long enough
I really wasn't planning on two blogs in the same week let along the same day. I wanted to space it out a little bit but I came across something and had to get it off my chest.
There is a March 31st parole hearing for the two jerkoffs who started the Boland Hall fire at Seton Hall University on January 19, 2000. In the full interest of disclosure I should point out that I was asleep on the third floor of Boland Hall about 20 yards from where the fire started.
Joseph LePore and Sean Ryan were sentenced to five years in prison a little over a year ago. If they are granted parole they will be released in May, just 16 months into that sentence. If you ask me it would be way too early. Three freshman died in that fire. Over fifty others were seriously injured and countless others will never be the same again. I thought five years was too lenient of a sentence. It should have been five years per casualty and another five years for everyone else. Let them rot in there for 20 years.
Maybe they didnt mean to kill anybody but you know what, they did, three times over. And then they proceeded to lie about it for seven years before they finally copped a plea and admitted to the crime, showing as little remorse as possible. One of their lawyers called them "Model Prisoners" as if we should just forget that the key word there is prisoner. Of course they will be good in there, they are in fucking jail. Calling these jackasses Model Prisoners is like calling Marion Jones a fast prisoner. They are still prisoners and still criminals.
I was lucky. I came out of the fire relatively unscathed. But I know people who were affected much more than I was. About a year or so ago, I was approached by the Prosecutor's Office and had there been a trial, I was most likely going to be called in as a witness. Apparently my testimony eight years ago was spot on and I was needed. It was something I was dreading. I can relive every minute of that night but its not something I wanted to do on a witness stand. I guess now I wish i had the opportunity. Maybe had it gone to trial we could have put those bastards away for longer.
I pray that this parole hearing is just a formality and it will be rejected. I'm not an evil guy but 16 months in a Youth Correctional Facility is just not long enough for what they did to those three families and hundreds of others.
My prayers are not for me. They are for Frank. They are for John. They are for Aaron. They are for everyone who stood with me outside on that cold January morning. And they are for everyone who has been touched by that horrific event.
I pray for Joseph and Sean too. What they will have to live with I wouldn't wish on anybody. I just hope they have to live with it behind bars for more than just another two months.
There is a March 31st parole hearing for the two jerkoffs who started the Boland Hall fire at Seton Hall University on January 19, 2000. In the full interest of disclosure I should point out that I was asleep on the third floor of Boland Hall about 20 yards from where the fire started.
Joseph LePore and Sean Ryan were sentenced to five years in prison a little over a year ago. If they are granted parole they will be released in May, just 16 months into that sentence. If you ask me it would be way too early. Three freshman died in that fire. Over fifty others were seriously injured and countless others will never be the same again. I thought five years was too lenient of a sentence. It should have been five years per casualty and another five years for everyone else. Let them rot in there for 20 years.
Maybe they didnt mean to kill anybody but you know what, they did, three times over. And then they proceeded to lie about it for seven years before they finally copped a plea and admitted to the crime, showing as little remorse as possible. One of their lawyers called them "Model Prisoners" as if we should just forget that the key word there is prisoner. Of course they will be good in there, they are in fucking jail. Calling these jackasses Model Prisoners is like calling Marion Jones a fast prisoner. They are still prisoners and still criminals.
I was lucky. I came out of the fire relatively unscathed. But I know people who were affected much more than I was. About a year or so ago, I was approached by the Prosecutor's Office and had there been a trial, I was most likely going to be called in as a witness. Apparently my testimony eight years ago was spot on and I was needed. It was something I was dreading. I can relive every minute of that night but its not something I wanted to do on a witness stand. I guess now I wish i had the opportunity. Maybe had it gone to trial we could have put those bastards away for longer.
I pray that this parole hearing is just a formality and it will be rejected. I'm not an evil guy but 16 months in a Youth Correctional Facility is just not long enough for what they did to those three families and hundreds of others.
My prayers are not for me. They are for Frank. They are for John. They are for Aaron. They are for everyone who stood with me outside on that cold January morning. And they are for everyone who has been touched by that horrific event.
I pray for Joseph and Sean too. What they will have to live with I wouldn't wish on anybody. I just hope they have to live with it behind bars for more than just another two months.
My Guardian Angel
I'm a guy who believes that everyone has a Guardian Angel. Sometimes these angels pop into your life when you least expect them but need them most. Mine did, but the irony is that she has been there the whole time. My guardian angel is my cousin Colleen.
Colleen is about four years younger than me and growing up we basically treated eachother like cousins who were four years apart. We saw eachother at Nana and Pop-Pop's house, did the birthday party thing and that was pretty much it. She got to high school the year I left for college so we never really interacted with eachother outside the usual family stuff. That all changed a few months ago.
I dont know what it was that changed things but it has been a blessing for me, and I'd like to think for her too. We started talking online more, just about every night. We exchanged texts and phone calls and went out for a few rounds of beer. But most importantly she has been getting me through a rough time over the last few months. I had recently had my heart broken and continue to almost every day. But every day Colleen is there for a joke, or just to listen. And I can't fully express how much that means to me.
Colleen has said two things that have really stuck with me. The first was when she told me that I wasn't the guy she thought I was. I don't really know how to take that because basically she said "I always thought you were an asshole but you really turned out to be a nice guy." But I'll take the compliment that I know it was meant to be. She really didnt know who I was. I was always the older cousin who was pretty much a jackass.
The other thing she said that hit me hard was when she told me that she always looked at me as a protective big brother more so than just a cousin. I was blown away by this. For a while I didnt even think she liked me, I had no idea she thought of me this way. Now, armed with this knowledge I'll do everything in my power to live up to the billing as the protective big brother. And hopefully I can repay what she has given me over the last few months as my guardian angel.
Colleen is about four years younger than me and growing up we basically treated eachother like cousins who were four years apart. We saw eachother at Nana and Pop-Pop's house, did the birthday party thing and that was pretty much it. She got to high school the year I left for college so we never really interacted with eachother outside the usual family stuff. That all changed a few months ago.
I dont know what it was that changed things but it has been a blessing for me, and I'd like to think for her too. We started talking online more, just about every night. We exchanged texts and phone calls and went out for a few rounds of beer. But most importantly she has been getting me through a rough time over the last few months. I had recently had my heart broken and continue to almost every day. But every day Colleen is there for a joke, or just to listen. And I can't fully express how much that means to me.
Colleen has said two things that have really stuck with me. The first was when she told me that I wasn't the guy she thought I was. I don't really know how to take that because basically she said "I always thought you were an asshole but you really turned out to be a nice guy." But I'll take the compliment that I know it was meant to be. She really didnt know who I was. I was always the older cousin who was pretty much a jackass.
The other thing she said that hit me hard was when she told me that she always looked at me as a protective big brother more so than just a cousin. I was blown away by this. For a while I didnt even think she liked me, I had no idea she thought of me this way. Now, armed with this knowledge I'll do everything in my power to live up to the billing as the protective big brother. And hopefully I can repay what she has given me over the last few months as my guardian angel.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
10 Years
Next month, I will celebrate my 27th Birthday. But April 28th hasn't always been a day for celebrating. Ten years ago on April 28, 1998 my best friend lost his mother to cancer and all of our lives were changed forever.
Growing up, Tim and I each had two moms, mine and his. I met Tim on his 6th birthday and we've been best buds ever since. Ironically, his mom left us on my 17th birthday. Mrs G was everything a kid could ever want in a "second mom". She always treated me like one of the family and when she passed away, I lost a special person in my life. But aside from being my birthday, it wasn't about me. It was about my best friend who lost his mother before he turned 16. I'll never forget sitting with Tim that night just holding him as he wept in my arms. He was forced to grow up basically overnight and he became a man that Mrs G would be terribly proud of.
In the last ten years, Tim has played a major role in a school play, he has graduated from high school and college where he served as school president. Mrs G wasn't able to see any of these events as we have but she has had a bird's eye view for every one of them. A year ago he was married to his sweetheart and next month they will welcome a beautiful baby into this world. I secretly had hoped that the baby would come on April 28th, thinking how perfect it would be to have everything come full circle ten years later. Something tells me that the doctors wont let it go that long but even if its not the exact day, it will most likely be the same month and the circle will be complete.
On April 28, 1998 Amy Gabrielli left this world far too early. In April of 2008, Tim and Jess Gabrielli will bring life into this world and I could not be prouder of my best friend. I can't wait to get that phone call and I can honestly say that I am not ashamed to admit that I will be crying when I do.
Tim is my brother. Jess is my little sister. Uncle Markus loves that baby already. And somewhere in Heaven a grandmother will be smiling.
Growing up, Tim and I each had two moms, mine and his. I met Tim on his 6th birthday and we've been best buds ever since. Ironically, his mom left us on my 17th birthday. Mrs G was everything a kid could ever want in a "second mom". She always treated me like one of the family and when she passed away, I lost a special person in my life. But aside from being my birthday, it wasn't about me. It was about my best friend who lost his mother before he turned 16. I'll never forget sitting with Tim that night just holding him as he wept in my arms. He was forced to grow up basically overnight and he became a man that Mrs G would be terribly proud of.
In the last ten years, Tim has played a major role in a school play, he has graduated from high school and college where he served as school president. Mrs G wasn't able to see any of these events as we have but she has had a bird's eye view for every one of them. A year ago he was married to his sweetheart and next month they will welcome a beautiful baby into this world. I secretly had hoped that the baby would come on April 28th, thinking how perfect it would be to have everything come full circle ten years later. Something tells me that the doctors wont let it go that long but even if its not the exact day, it will most likely be the same month and the circle will be complete.
On April 28, 1998 Amy Gabrielli left this world far too early. In April of 2008, Tim and Jess Gabrielli will bring life into this world and I could not be prouder of my best friend. I can't wait to get that phone call and I can honestly say that I am not ashamed to admit that I will be crying when I do.
Tim is my brother. Jess is my little sister. Uncle Markus loves that baby already. And somewhere in Heaven a grandmother will be smiling.
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